Global Leadership Speaker and Premier Work-Life Balance Speaker
Speaking Information at (727) 467-0202 or e-mail


It all comes down to forgiveness — forgiving others and forgiving yourself. That’s where a true reset occurs. Because once you let go, you grow.

“Forgiveness is a gift you give to yourself.” I heard that quote years ago, and now everyone from Suzanne Somers to Tony Robbins is claiming it. Since everyone is claiming the words, you might as well do it, too. Hang onto them, because they so succinctly sum up the “why” of forgiveness. It isn’t about the other person. It’s about you. Every anger, misgiving, or resentment you cling to hurts you, not the person who wronged you.

Once you let go of it for yourself, you can often take the step of forgiving in total. You can then forgive the other person for his or her sake.

My ex-husband and I talk almost every week, and we’ve been divorced for more than twenty years. There were some deep hurts that led to our split, but if I’d hung onto them, I would have completely lost someone I loved. My life would be emptier without him. So he has my complete forgiveness — and believe me, I’m sure he has had to do some forgiving, too.

Why choose animosity and resentment when you can let go, move on, and rebuild something new and different?

You can forgive someone that you never want to see again. I’ve done that. It comes down to a question of how much you want to let that person re-victimize you in absentia. Do you think that client’s former boss would have felt bad about having scarred that woman for so many years? Pretty doubtful. So who was she punishing?

Have you been punishing yourself by getting stuck in the past? Let go. Move on.

C. S. Lewis summed it up best: “Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing monkey bars. You have to let go at some point in order to move forward.”


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